O dear. Where should I begin? He is absolutely amazing. He always knows what to say and when to day it. He knows how to help people out. He helps me all the time. He is soo sweet and kind. He knows how to cheer me up when I am sad. And he is ALWAYS there for me. Now he thinks he has more swag than me but he secretly knows that I have more swag. O and he also owes me a hamburger. Although I have yet to meet him, I call him my brother. Honestly I do believe that we are related somehow. We have been in the same situations and we always know how to help each other. He is my best friend. I can talk to him about absolutely anything. Now there isn’t that many people in the world that I honestly do trust, but he is one of them. If anyone were to mess with this boy, you better know that I will jump right in and fight his battles for him, he may be a big boy who can handle it himself, but I will ALWAYS get in the middle for him, and he WILL WIN! If any chick messes with you, you better know that I WILL be coming up to Woodstock and kicking their ass! NO ONE messes with my big brother! Soo, I don’t know how we have gotten to be sooo close but im glad we are. This is how we met, I creeped on my friends facebook when he was over my house and decided to talk to this kid. :)
and I am so glad that I did. Because matt is the most amazing person in this world. I don’t know what I would do without him in my life. I do know that I haven’t had him in my life forever but ever since September 25, I don’t know what I would do without him. I talk to him everyday. There has only been like 3 days since we started talking that we haven’t talked and those days have been sad. Lol. I cant wait to meet him. I am overly excited for this. Now, this kid can be very cocky at times, but I do still love him. its so hard not to. :)
I will ALWAYS be here for him, just like he is always there for me:) now there is so much more that I could say but I know most of you wont read all of this…so I am going to go now. Lol I LOVE YOU MATTTT<33333
♥, Megan Leanne Martino!:)
ONE OF A KIND, that is one way to describe him. There is NOONE on this Earth is as sweet, kind, & understanding as him. He is always putting others before himself. Loves to help whomever he can, whenever he can & however he can. Everyone that meets this kid is sooo lucky, even if they don’t know it. He touches so many lives & has no idea the impact he really has. I can honestly say he is totally AHH-MAZING. I have not a clue what I would do without him in my life; we talk for hours about nothing, yet everything. Sometimes he talks to me about his problems, which is good. I want him to know I’m always going to be here for him. He doesn’t even have to try; just being him is what makes him so great. God blessed him with so many talents & abilities for a reason & I he past wasn’t the best, but it made him this incredible man & he shouldn’t regret any of it. We have become good friends throughout the last months. & I have come to know that he is stronger than a lot of other people I know, including myself. He will takes on others burdens & troubles without a blink, so they can feel better. Never complain about anything, just doing what needs to be done. Doesn’t have to try to put a smile on anyone’s face, he just does. He never believes he is more than anyone else. Putting everything he has into everything he does. He doesn’t judge people by anything, but who they are. The GREATEST friend, & a wonderful secret keeper, I’m sure he holds hundreds. He is a lady’s man, no doubt, but he won’t treat girls like trash, or toys. He knows the right things to say to a girl, but he isn't all talk like most guys. He actually cares what they think & say. Isn't just trying to get in there pants, he isn't like that. He would never dissrespect you. He understands so much more than most his age & is so much to so many people. He could do anything he puts his mind to, & tries his best at. With his many dreams that he places on hold to help those who need it. He smiles through whatever he goes through. Never setting aside his morals, or values. He knows what he believes in & he will stand for it no matter the cost. But, he sees none of this. He just sees another person, like every other. Many people call him many things, I just call him my friend : ) I love you, Lawrence Superman Smith ♥ & don’t you EVER change!
*Katherine Lynn Shank*
chey-leigh28 asked: Why are you so amazing?(: haha <3 you brother ^_^
Haha I don’t know. I’m just me c:
I have those days where I want to have a relationship. I want to be that guy that shows her what other guys have failed to show. I don’t want to live up to a girl ideal man, I want to exceed the expectations which I know I can do. See here is why its hard for me to have a relationship, when girls get me they’re not use to it. They’re not use to having a guy treat them right, with respect, an understanding guy. Its all new to them and its a shame that it is because it shouldn’t be that way. Girls should be having the guy of there dreams. Just know that a guy is not going to be able to be perfect in every area. We all lack in one, two, maybe three areas. For me its my looks. As you can see I’m not a very attractive guy but I make up for it in my personality. If girls would give me the time and day to just talk and have a real conversation like they deserve than maybe something would happen. I’m way different from other guys and I won’t just say that but I will show you for the rest of my life. One thing that shows I’m different is I’m a virgin so I’m not looking for a girl to just have sex with, I want to invest my emotion into her. I want to be the reason for her smiling. I want to turn her bad day into a good day by just having her talk to me and I listen. When something happens, I want her to be able to trust me enough to come to me. I will do everything in my power to give her want she needs. I want to show my love to her. I want to show her off to the whole damn world. I want to spend as much time as I can with her but also give her her space that she’ll need. I want to have that relationship where we act like best friends but its something more than that. I want to be awkward with her and have that relationship that people look at and say “Damn they still together?” I’m saying all this not out of loneliness but out of actually wanting a REALationship. Everybody deserves one but it has to be the right time, the right moment, and the right person. It has to be with somebody who can understand me and what I have been through. Someone who knows how to put a smile on my face just by looking at her. Here is the thing if you have a great personality than I will fall in love with who you are not for what you look like. I mean that in the most polite way. Lets just so if your personality is beautiful to me everything else on you is beautiful. Just remember that. A way to my heart is not through sex, its through conversations, being yourself, and just smiling :) I love a girl smile and the next favorite thing is the beautiful eyes. I love looking into a girl’s eyes and getting lost in them. I know this all may sound cheesy/corny but that’s what I want. I also want to be able to respond to a question that ask “How is your life?” with Oh she is great because for the simple fact is she would be my life.
Well I’m done here and I appreciate you reading this.
Goodnight Tumblr and much love to all of you and I hope you get what ever it is that you are looking for in that special person. c:
- Dear person I hate,
- Dear person I like,
- Dear ex boyfriend,
- Dear ex girlfriend,
- Dear ex bestfriend,
- Dear bestfriend,
- Dear *anyone*,
- Dear Santa,
- Dear mom,
- Dear dad,
- Dear future me,
- Dear past me,
- Dear person I’m jealous of,
- Dear person I had a crush on,
- Dear girlfriend,
- Dear boyfriend,
thatashleyfreak asked: Keep your head up (: Get ahold of me if you need anything.
Thank will do c:
Okay so I’m sitting thinking about my life, whats going on, what I miss, what I want, etc. Well first off shit has been getting crazy and at times I feel like I’m crazy. Honestly I’m not even sure on how I feel about anything. Just so much is going on and I don’t feel like I have anybody to talk to about it because they’ll either lie saying they understand or they won’t even know what to do. Yes I know that I have people who will listen to what I have to say and they’ll be there for me if I allow them to but for some reason I can get myself to do so. Its not that I don’t trust them even though I do have major trust issues because of family and a few broken hearts but its life. We all go through stuff in life and there is no excuse to feel pity for yourself. I have so much going on I don’t even know where to begin. Lets start with the fact that I miss a lot of people and things I had. I miss who use to be my best friend/bestie Kristin. My life hasn’t been the same since she left my life. I love her like only a best friend could but at the time everything was going down I let a stupid meaningless relationship ruin everything we ever had. I miss talking to her, I miss seeing her, I even miss the time it was difficult for us to even hang out because of her parents. Sometimes I want to text her and see if she wants to hang out but I doubt it because I hurt so much and I proved that I was just like all the other guys. That I too hurt females feelings. She was the one and only person I could go to about anything and everything. Like legit tell her everything and now she’s gone because of me. I also miss my friend Sierra who I also use to like a lot and thought we had chemistry on so many level. I use to like her a lot but I really don’t anymore. I just miss having her there as a friend and hanging but its neither of ours fault. Its life keeping us so busy with jobs, family drama, friends drama, etc. One day I would like to be able to talk to her again and catch up on life. I also miss my little sister who lives in NC Megan. I miss who so much even though I only got to meet her once but it was a great time. If there was anybody that could understand this post and how I’m feeling, it would be her. We literally are like twins brother and sister except we don’t look alike we just have the ability to know how we each feel about things and we go through the same thing in life at the same time or around the same time. She really has helped me a lot more then she knows. I love her to death and want nothing but the best for and I want her to be happy. That’s why I always try to help her out with everything no matter what it is. It could be something pointless to me but if it means something to her I’m there for her. I really hope that one day soon we get to hang out because I need to see her and give her the biggest hug like I promised her a long time ago. Another thing I miss is my ex girlfriend Alexis. I really don’t know why because she’s not even the same person I once loved. Like I really don’t know how to explain this but sometimes I want to go back no matter how big of a mistake it would be or how stupid I would be. I know that nobody in this world would approve of this and I know I should never go back. I’m not going back its just one of those things where you just find closure for yourself and just move on. Sometimes I feel like I’m locked down in a relationship but I’m not even dating anybody and I think it has to do with my ex. I just wish so many things was different in life right now.
Well here comes the family drama part of the post. I have so much issues going on in my family life I’m not sure that I can handle it much longer. I really just want to give up on my family and fucking leave here. I mean I’m living with my sister but only for so long because she is leaving to move back up to Tennessee as soon as she can. So that could be any time soon. I might have to go back with my mom and live with this other guy that I just can’t stand any more. Lets start from the beginning, My family and I lived in a motel around March which is around my birthday till in April. During that time in the motel my mom was helping this guy with his cleaning business so she could make money. Well they got to talking and made an agreement about living with each other at his house. Something told me that this wasn’t a good idea and I tried to tell my mom but you know how parents are they don’t listen to how you feel about things or what you say. So we moved in there April 26, 2012 and been there ever since and boy has it been hell. I mean at first it started of good but as we all know that everything starts off good and there will be a breakage some where along the line. Well that breakage happened in July around the time my sister got married and my aunt, uncle, and cousin came up. Well things started unfolding and it wasn’t looking good. He started talking shit about my family to me about every little thing. Like my mom sex life that I didn’t know about and didn’t even want to know or needed to know. She was using him for money and he was using her for sex. He’s a 69 years old man and my mom is 40. Honestly I don’t even want to go on about any of this anymore because I’m about to cry like a bitch but I feel like I need to cry and maybe it’ll make things better for me or atleast feel better. Man life is fucking tough and I really don’t know what to do any more. I mean I knew life wasn’t going to be easy but I been in this bullshit life for a long time. Dealing with everything that was put in my way at the age of 10. Like watching my little brother and sister when I was 10, dealing with abusive mans in and out of my life, not knowing the truth about my dad, me wanting to meet him but not knowing where to start, the fact my family was split up and put into a group home/foster care, being used and made fun of for what I believe in, me being a virgin, partly deft in both ears, speech problems, born without a rectum, my mom and sister not talking to each other, my family hating each other and always fighting with one another. We’re not even a family any more. One day when everybody is out of the house and in their own house/apartment/trailer none of us is going to ever talk to one another any more. My life just keeps getting worst and worst but I keep believing that one day it will all get better and it will all be over. But as each new day passes by my believe gets less and less and eventually it’ll get to the point of not believing again. I know that everybody has a tough life and we all go through things for a reason(s). Well I don’t even know what to say any more and I can’t even see what I’m typing because of all this water works going on.
Well goodnight gonna try to get some sleep.
Say what ever you want I really don’t care